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You need to wear a dress or something feminine to a Speed Dating Los Angeles event.

Don’t wear jeans unless you are wearing heels and a nice shirt that shows some skin.

It’s all like Goldilocks: this one is too flighty, this one isn’t funny enough. Over the sound of the cappuccino maker and the uptalk and vocal fry of the teenagers at the next table, my date, “B.,” and I get to know each other. “Blind dates, online, mixers.” But nothing was really working.

She’s looking for “just right.” Knowing that someone is out there, looking out for you, gives you a kind of swagger. And anyone who’s been on Tinder for more than three minutes can tell you, it is not great for one’s sense of self-worth. After every conversation, I felt a little better about myself, about my options. A friend suggested TDR to her to get her out of the bubble of single life. “Sunday night is the toughest night for singles,” Adelle says, “The weekend’s over, the work week is starting and you’re back where you started.” During a Sunday night conversation, Adelle’s matchmaker hit her with an epiphany that really resonated: the only person who really knows what you’re looking for is you.

When her matchmaker asked her to do some brand marketing for TDR, Adelle was happy to make the leap from the corporate world. (I’m really bad at Tindering.) Of course TDR costs money and the apps are free, but you do often get what you pay for. and I tried to schedule a second date, but couldn’t get our schedules lined up.

Even though she came in to interview for a marketing job, it became clear that she could do more with TDR and, before she knew it, she was matchmaking. With Adelle, at least, there was a person, a human being on the journey with me. After a few attempts, it was clear that we weren’t quite on the same page. (Still not quite funny enough.) I’m back in the Tinder/Bumble-verse now and I’ve had a little success, but I miss Adelle. After all, isn’t the whole point to find that right someone and get out of the dating pool all together?

Make friends with other women so it shows you are friendly and not threatened by the ‘competition.’ When men see you chatting up other women, it shows that you are warm, confident, and engaging.

If you are smiling when talking to other women, men can’t wait to meet you during their 6 minute round with you.

During most of that time, I’ve been wildly, definitively, stubbornly single. In the past two years, I’ve had maybe three matches turn into dates.When you touch his arm or shirt at a Speed Dating Los Angeles Event, you are sending the signal that you think he’s worth getting to know more.This Speed Dating Los Angeles tip shows him that you are capable of making an instant connection.As a Los Angeleno in the modern era, “dating” has mostly revolved around apps. I've found LA bars to be either total meat markets with music too loud for conversation or dark bars tucked into weird corners of town for hardcore drinkers. I instantly regret choosing it -- I sort of regret all my life choices up until this point. Before the shame spiral really gets spiraling, she walks in, all dressed in blue. Eventually, we turned to the task at hand: what was I looking for? We think, “Well, I’ll know it when I see it.” But how do you look for it?I don’t go to the gym enough or do yoga or whatever people do now to meet women during exercise. Physically, she’s just my type: the right height, the right curves, a killer smile. Adelle had a standard “intake” interview: a series of questions about me, about my dating history, my likes and dislikes. (Lacking kindness, for sure.) Adelle was great, totally non-judgmental about my quirks and oddities.There were one or two possibilities, but they weren’t quite right. At the time, she was working in corporate marketing and communications.

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