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Even very sexually active men can feel like failures, and become obsessed with their sexual performance. It can be a celebration of your bodies, of a great partnership, of a beautiful moment. You are a powerful man with potent sexuality that women can feel, regardless of whether you’ve had sex recently. I can tell you that when most women meet a great guy, they aren’t worried about his experience level.

That’s because experience has nothing to do with great sex. That has nothing to do with the notches on your bedpost.

Sure, some women like the big muscly guy, but it’s only a small percentage of us.

No matter who you are, you have some very awesome, attractive things about you that women will like.

No one is great their first time with a new person, no matter how many other partners they’ve had!

As I’ve already explained, presence is the key here, not technique!

How can you reconcile your potent sexuality with the idea that male desire is wrong or frightening?

Don’t think you have to be fashionable to get a girl, if you really couldn’t care less about what shoes you wear.Right now it feels like sex is a ridiculously big deal, I understand that.But the more you allow yourself to see it as just another act, another way to express energies and emotions that you are already expressing meaningfully via other outlets, the less power it will have over you.The truth is, great, eligible, sexy guys staying virgins into adulthood is a growing trend, a new normal. You want to have sex, but you don’t want to scare women away by coming on too strong.You may not feel confident with women, because you don’t have much experience.All of us can feel latent shame about our sexuality and our bodies, because our culture teaches us that everything about sex, including not having it, is shameful. There is nothing shameful about your sex life, whatever it’s like.

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